Category Archives: Movies

New Star Wars Movies Are Coming

October 30, 2012   Dr. Monstrosity   2 Comments

Big news in the Star Wars universe!  Disney is buying Lucasfilm and George Lucas is retiring.  Of course Disney plans to exploit the crap out of the Star Wars franchise and they will be making new films, and shirts, theme park rides, comics, underwear, coffins, welcome mats, plush toys, dental fillings, baby wipes, shoe polish, floor wax, push up bras, rectal thermometers, and more!

Good or Bad?
Does this mean:  “Eeeewww Disney Star Wars, it’s gonna be terrible!”

Or:  “Yay Lucas is retiring, it has a chance to be good!!”

You decide.

The Next SW Film
The next film will be called Star Wars Episode 7, due out in 2015.  Will we see an old Luke fighting alongside his older dad Darth Vader against some new foe?  Will Han and Leia’s son be some new hero/smuggler/jedi?  Will Jabba the Hut grow bigger and bigger engulfing the entire galaxy?  Who knows?  Who cares?  Star Wars hasn’t been worth a crap since The Empire Strikes Back, over 30 years ago.  I’m still mad at Lucas for pissing off the 15 year old me when Return of the Jedi was released.  Damn you Lucas!!!

 

PRESS RELEASE

Global leader in high-quality family entertainment agrees to acquire world-renowned Lucasfilm Ltd, including legendary STAR WARS franchise.

Acquisition continues Disney’s strategic focus on creating and monetizing the world’s best branded content, innovative technology and global growth to drive long-term shareholder value.

Lucasfilm to join company’s global portfolio of world class brands including Disney, ESPN, Pixar, Marvel and ABC.

STAR WARS: EPISODE 7 feature film targeted for release in 2015.

UPDATE:

My crazy ideas ain’t so crazy!
Rumor from i09.com:
Disney wants to bring Darth Vader back. The U.K. tabloid, The Express, quotes an industry source as saying, “He’s an integral part of the franchise. Replacing him is virtually impossible. The plan is for him to return and play a significant role in the new films.”

Read More

Not All Zombie Movies Are Good

October 27, 2012   Dr. Monstrosity   1 Comment
Remains-movie

Every zombie movie can’t be great.  Remains is a zombie flick based on a Steve Niles comic series, so I expected good things.  Unfortunately I didn’t get them.

I’m a big Steve Niles fan.  Aleister Arcane, The Lurkers, Cal MacDonald; great stuff.  I did not read Remains and based on this movie I’m not going to.

Remains is a low budget flick with 28 Days Later style zombies that are more like sick people than undead.  They don’t have any cool rotting flesh makeup, although later in the film confusingly they are referred to as undead and they start looking a bit decayed.  It’s hard to tell if they just don’t die that easily or they are undead.

A few things distinguish this from other zombie films;(spoilers) the zombies “sleep” and they eat on another.  The scares in this film are mostly the cheap contrived pop out at you type.  There are a host of illogical set ups to get to the scares and it gets frustrating to the viewer after a while.

Steve Niles

Even more notably bad in Remains are the characters.  They are flat and stupid.  They really do a lot of stupid things, half the time they don’t even have the sense to pick up a weapon.   Any attempts at characterization are clumsy and uninteresting.  I really didn’t care who lived or died or if anyone lived at all.

Steve Niles didn’t write the script or direct this movie so its poor quality certainly isn’t entirely his fault, but this is the worst thing I’ve experienced that had Steve Niles’ name attached to it.  I’m hoping it remains the worst.

Read More

Chronicle: The Best Superhero Movie That’s Not Really a Superhero Movie

August 15, 2012   Dr. Monstrosity   1 Comment
Chronicle-movie

Chronicle (2012)
Movie Review

This might be one of the best superhero movies I’ve ever seen, although it’s not really a superhero movie in the traditional sense with guys in costumes saying pithy things and saving little old ladies.  Like most superhero movies, Chronicle sits comfortably in the science fiction genre; but unlike your typical super hero movie, it’s not over the top and larger than life.  It has realism not present in most superhero movies.

The story reminded me of the Star Trek episode Where No Man Has Gone Before when Kirk’s friend Gary Mitchell gets super powers and continues getting stronger until he can do just about anything.  Nebbish Andrew Detmer, his cousin Matt and popular guy friend Steve encounter a weird artifact and their lives are topsy turvy from then on.  They all end up with strange telekinetic powers.  The changes these characters go through as a result of their new abilities are compelling and believable.  Things are all fun and games at the start, but predictably they go south.  Thankfully, the film’s predictability doesn’t prevent it from being a massively entertaining success.  It has strengths such as well-developed characters, fine acting, and mind blowing action.

Three super friends

Another aspect that may lead you away from this film however is that it’s another of those ‘characters filming themselves with a handheld camera’ movies.  Surprisingly, even though a bit contrived, it works.  The perspective shifts from our main character’s camera to minor character’s camera to security cameras and so on.  It ends up being another one of the entertaining characteristics of the movie.  Another fantastic part of this film is the special effects.  They are flawless.  They are just enough to give you a sense of strange reality, but not excessive to the point of CGI overload.  And the action scenes in the finally are spectacular.  The shifts in perspective due to the different cameras add a sense of realism seldom seen in any superhero type film.

You have to give major kudos to director Josh Trank who co-wrote Chronicle and made the movie for $12 million.  Wow!  And it’s his first feature film.  I have high hopes for this guy.  His future projects, all based on comic books, are rumored to include The Red Star, The Fantastic Four, and Venom.

Read More
« Older posts
Newer posts »